She rolled out of her bed, and the morning sun blinded her. Her head throbbed, her mouth was dry and she had the incredible urge to puke her guts out. After waking up from a hangover, North Garland senior Kim* could not remember anything that happened the night before, but her friends told her that she was “happy.”

“I was at a party, and my mom went to go pick me up and I had already controlled it so well that when I was drunk I could act normal,” Kim said. “When I saw that I was at that point, I knew that it was bad and had to hide it from my parents which was the worst.”

When Kim began to realize she had a problem she was hesitant to fully admit to herself that she was an alcoholic.

“I finally realized it big time when I started doing it at the house, I would hide it from my parents,” Kim said. “When they were there I would hide it and my dad would be asking, ‘Where are my beers? Where’s this, where’s this and where’s this?’ And I would just get to the point where I went into full-on depression.”

After being a self-described alcoholic since middle school, Kim was introduced to Party Sober through Ryan Edge, a Twitter-famous guy she follows. Party Sober is a website for teens recovering from abuse that seek help from others who have won the battle of abuse.

“Party Sober is just basically a support group that helps you get over drinking,” Kim said. “If you are having problems drinking or had problems drinking, it would help you recover.”

Family was one of the factors that pushed Kim to stop drinking, because she knew that was not a lifestyle that she wanted for herself or for those she wants to be a role model to.

“My uncle passed away, and I saw the effect that it was putting on my family,” Kim said. “The thing that stopped me was I saw my brothers and my sister and I [thought], ‘I can’t. I don’t want them to see that,’ because they’ve seen [the effects of alcohol in] some parts of their life, and I don’t want them to keep seeing that.”

When Kim found Party Sober, the support groups helped her the most. She said whenever she felt like giving up, or when she felt that there was no one to talk to, they were always there for her.

“If you’re a recovering alcoholic, recovering drug addict, you have abuse or anything at home they will be there,” Kim said. “If you need someone to talk to, or you feel you can’t talk to any one because they can’t relate, there is always someone that can relate to you there.”

Party Sober is not just a site to Kim but something that she encourages others to look into.

“Party Sober to me means using nothing that can harm my body, nothing that’s illegal, nothing that can potentially affect my future,” Kim said. “Nothing can go in my body, no alcohol and no drugs.”

Party Sober has many challenges to recover from things ranging from drug abuse to physical abuse, and Kim took on a challenge that related to her alcohol abuse.

“My Party Sober challenge was to not drink ever. Forever,” Kim said. “Even when I turn 21, when it’s legal for me to drink, I don’t want to do it. I don’t want to drink. I don’t want to smoke. And I don’t want to put anything in my body anymore that will harm it.”

When she started her challenge, one of her friends helped her to become sober by distracting her from doing activities that would involve alcohol.

“He helped me by telling me ‘Don’t go out and party. Don’t go out. If you feel the temptation to get a bottle, go get a water bottle instead and drink that,’” Kim said. “I would have the temptation but I would do what he told me, and I would go get water. He would come over to my house a lot to help me with that. He would be like ‘No, let’s go play video games’ or ‘Let’s go watch a movie’ just to get my mind off of [drinking].”

When she first started her Party Sober challenge, Kim admitted that it was difficult.

“There were temptations everywhere,” Kim said. “I would get asked to parties. I would say no, because I knew how I would end up, and I didn’t want that.”

She tried her best to stay away from alcohol until one party.

“I was good for a month and a half and then New Year’s came around,” Kim said. “I fell into temptation. It was just for one night, but to me, I still think of that as a big failure.”

Because Kim’s friends had pressured her into drinking that night, she had to go through withdrawal all over again. She did not want to get out of bed, because of how sick she had felt.

“You think [alcohol] will make it better, but it just makes you forget the question that you were thinking about,” Kim said. “It will only make you forget the problem, not fix it. Now I fix my problems. I face my problems I don’t just avoid my problems by just drinking.”

Because Kim has vowed to no longer take in anything that will harm her body, she is now helping others cope with their substance abuse such as her friends and family.

“I gained more respect from my family, and now I am helping out my family with their alcohol problems,” Kim said. “I’ve shown one of my friends [the site], because he was having problems with crystal meth and it helped him a lot. They are trying to promote a drug-free lifestyle, so if you’re recovering they appreciate that. They want that. They want to defame the drug life, because that’s what most kids now think. ‘I want to smoke.’ ‘I want to drink.’ But that’s not what it’s about.”

*Names have been changed to protect identities

Read about Staying Cautious of Influences here: https://www.raiderecho.com/in-depth/2014/05/02/staff-editorial-staying-cautious-of-influences/